Friday afternoon I heard Britney Spears was going to open the MTV VMA's and I knew it was something I had to see. On the dot of 9:00 p.m. out she came. Stomping mechanically through innane dance moves wearing a sparkly bikini made for a much thinner person. I was transfixed, sometimes even horrified at the spectical. I kept wondering who thought it was a good idea for her to do this. In addition to the ridiculous dancing she wasn't singing, nor was she even attempting to keep up the charade of lip-synching. At the end I pronouced it a train-wreck and tuned back in to Brett Michaels "Rock of Love". This morning it seemed the AP agreed with me...it was just so awful none of us could look away.